The idea to start a dining critique blog occured to me this afternoon as I struggled to gnaw through the beef jerky that one of the so-called "Top Ten Lunch Spots in Tucson" attempted to disguise as their "Spiced New York Steak." Upon entering the restaurant "Feast" in downtown Tucson, AZ area, for a solo lunch before heading back to good old Sierra Vista, I was eagerly greeted by a seemingly pleasant waiter who enthusiastically suggested the "Spiced New York Steak" as a late lunch option. At $19.50 I figured, what the hell, I havent eaten all day, it might be a bit much for lunch but its bound to be tasty and I'm always craving a good piece of steak. Serious, serious mistake. The entree, as described on the menu, reads
"Spiced New York Steak~ Seared Angus Beef New York steak rubbed with cinnamon, star anise, ginger and white pepper, with a relish of lemon, orange, garlic and fennel. Served with scallion rice cakes and sautéed spinach."
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| Please take it away |
However, let me peel back the heavy layer of BS and translate for you: "Overpriced, Disappointing How-Dare-You-Call-Yourself-New-York-Steak~ Overdone, beef-jerky-ish tendon-aplenty steak, covered in a gritty, makes-you-wince rub of sorts topped with toss-in-the trash lemon, orange and garlic peel leftovers. Served with three tasteless gummy rice plops and oversalted, makes me want to gag sauteed spinach. All served luke warm..... I am not exaggerting or joking in the slightest - this seriously may have been the worst meal I have ever eaten out. The plate came off as poorly prepared and downright confused. The flavors, or lack-there-of, were severaly conflicted making for a sufficiently miserable meal. After literally forcing myself to fight through half of the steak, I called it quits, decided to rant publicly about how awful the meal was by launching a blog, and nabbed the check. So unless you favor tacky table cloths, break-your-back wood chairs, and overcooked, overpriced, food, I don't suggest you waste your time with "Feast." ...
In summary...
"Feast" 4122 E. Speedway, Tucson
http://www.eatatfeast.com/
Ratings:
Food: Gross
Service: Fine, less the steak recommendation
Atmosphere/Decor: Trying too hard to seem like they're not trying...
Overall experience: There's no way I feast at "Feast" ever again
Phew, that was a rant, but it feels good to get it out. Anyways, I haven't totally given up on Tucson, I did grab a flyer for the 2010 Tucson Culinary Festival which seems promising.... as for tonight, I'm taking on a new recipe for meatballs I've been excited to try and looking forward to some traditional angel hair and meatballs to get the sour taste of "Feast" out of my mouth...
